Text: John 11:1-44
“Jesus said to her, ‘Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?’” —John 11:40
An old shoemaker’s awl is on prominent display in the French Academy of Science. That awl fell from the shoemaker’s table one day and put out the eye of his 9-year-old son. Soon, the child became blind in both eyes and had to attend a school for the blind. At this school, the child learned to read by handling large, carved, wooden blocks.
When the shoemaker’s son grew up, he thought of a new way for the blind to read. It involved punching tiny dots onto paper, and Louis Braille devised this new method using the same awl that had blinded him in his youth.
It’s been suggested that there would be a falling awl in each of our lives. When it strikes, some of us ask, “Why did God allow this to happen?” Others ask, “How will God use it?”
In John 11, Mary and her sister, Martha, were struck with the awl of tragedy—the death of their brother, Lazarus. When Jesus finally showed up, Martha went out to meet him while Mary “remained seated in the house.” She was stuck in her grief. Instead of worshiping the way she had been known to worship, Mary was paralyzed by a why-did-God-allow-this moment. When she finally did come out to meet Jesus she fell at his feet, saying, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” Jesus shared a moment of heartbreak with her, being “deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled.” He wept.
When the awl strikes, it’s never a happy moment. It’s a time of grief. Loss. Heartbreak. Unimaginable pain. It can torment us. It can make us bring into question everything we have ever believed about the God we worship, and the promise of His goodness in our lives. And if we are not careful, it can also paralyze us from our greatest expression of being fully alive—the way we worship.
How do I get my spirit to dance when the heart is broken? How can I get out of the seat when the pain feels like shards of glass cutting the soul into pieces? How can I sing a melody of praise when everything inside me just wants to scream—why? I can’t pretend to understand how Mary must’ve felt in her state of grief. After Lazarus had been in the tomb for four days, the situation was not just bleak, but the prospect of ever seeing him again on this side of heaven was impossible.
Jesus, like only He can, is able to reconcile the despair of weeping with the dare to worship. Our Savior not only shares our pain (Hebrews 4:15), He invites us to mutually share in the fellowship of His sufferings and to know the “power of His resurrection” (Philippians 3:10). He said to Martha, “Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?” The next verse tells us, “they took away the stone,” and you know how this story ends. There is a resurrection celebration.
Only Jesus can take us from the why did God allow it to the how God will use it. With Jesus, our grief is never divorced from a resurrection. There is always a “next verse” to our pain because the suffering is always married to the promise of something greater. Think about that as you seek to abide in Him this week.
PRAYER
Heavenly Father, just as Jesus wept with Mary and Martha in their heartbreak, you know the depth of our pain. You know the trauma, the tragedy, the fears, the anxiety, the anger, and the questions of doubt that tend to paralyze us. We can take courage in knowing that you never leave us to ourselves when we are hurting. You always have a ‘next verse’ to the suffering, and it will always be a beautiful picture of resurrection. Holy Spirit, empower us to worship when our flesh wants to remain seated. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Questions for Personal Reflection or Group Discussion:
- When have you been faced with a “Why did God allow this” moment?
- In what ways can pain be used for redemptive purposes?
- When have you found it hard to worship God, because of a difficult situation?
- What do you make of the idea that Jesus weeps with us in our pain, while mutually calling upon us to share in the fellowship of His sufferings?
- Where does “belief” in the glory of God need to be awakened in your pain? How do you need to worship God in this moment, though your flesh might feel paralyzed by circumstances?
